That is my intention for 2016: To be fearless.

I admit that I'm taking some creative liberties with this word. I don't literally mean to be without fear. That is impossible for any human being. Fear is unavoidable and even essential to our existence.

What I mean by fearless is to not be controlled by fear, to not be held back by fear, to not be owned by fear, to not allow fear to keep me small. By being fearless, I mean that I want to allow fear to be there and to keep moving forward anyway.

Right now, I am mothering an infant and a four-year-old. I am figuring out how to maintain my top priority of raising my babies, while working hard at growing my work passions—my jewelry business, my yoga teaching, my book, my work at Kripalu.  There is tremendous fear around how all of this will come together.

How will I have enough time for everything? Will I be able to make enough money to meet our family's needs and goals? How will I take care of myself? Or will I lose myself in the mix? How will I do it all? What if I fail at something, or everything? How will I truly be present for my children with all of this going on? And what about my husband? When will we have time to nurture our marriage, which is at the center of all things that matter in my life?

I don't want to deny these fears or minimize them. It creates inner conflict and turmoil when I turn away from an inner experience that is true and real.

At the same time, I do not want these fears to limit me.

Fearless.

The truth is, I no longer have the luxury of being owned by my fears. In my twenties, if something made me too uncomfortable, I could easily go the other way. But I know, in my heart of hearts, that this approach no longer serves me. I have talents and capabilities waiting for me to tap into more deeply. There are possibilities that require me to be with my fear and consciously move through it. I owe this to my children, to my husband, to my clients, and, most of all, I owe it to myself.

Fearless, to me, is the presence of fear—minus its grip on me.

How will I do this?

By allowing. When fear rises up, I will notice it and soften around it. I'll use Dirgha breath to remain open, and I will allow the fear to flow through me. When I allow, it moves through me more quickly. I can move past it and on to something else, and I can ultimately be less in its grasp, feeling more freedom on all levels. (Want to practice Dirgha with me now? Here's my free download.)

By witnessing. As I allow the fear to flow, I will practice witnessing it. I'll return to a place within me that is steady and calm, even amidst turmoil. From there, I will watch the fear, without naming it as good or bad. When I witness my fear without judging it or needing to change it, it begins to lose its charge and its power. Sometimes, a particular fear completely fades away. (Read more about witnessing in my earlier post.)

By using my tools: yoga, gratitude, meditation, mindfulness, and social support. I feel busier than ever these days, so it's easy to let my practices fall to the background. Yet, it's in this time of juggling so many important responsibilities that I need my tools the most. (Whoops, be right back—my baby, Tayo, is waking up from his nap.) Now, back to my practices ...

• Yoga helps me to be more present, both professionally and personally, with what is in front of me throughout the day. It helps me more fully experience a new sound that Tayo makes or a hug from Kai. When I work, I am more effective, because I am focused.


• Gratitude practice helps me focus on what is working well, which gives me energy and inspiration to keep moving forward.


• Mindfulness keeps me out of overwhelm. When I am aware of what’s happening in a given moment, I am less likely to spiral into fear and paralysis. And, again, I am more likely to absorb the sweet moments of bliss, joy, and connection.


• Social support gives me strength, as I am reminded that I am not in this alone.

By drinking chai tea: I've been to a few nutrition talks; I know that caffeine isn't good for my adrenal system. But I love my chai tea each morning. Caffeine is a mood elevator, and that little boost helps me stay in a positive, productive mode rather than a worried, anxious mode. I drink my tea, I carpe diem, and that's that.

Some days, I will stumble a lot with all of this, and, on other days, I will soar. On all days, I will work to remain committed to my intention: to be fearless.

I love to hear from you. Please leave a comment below and tell me: What is your intention for 2016? And how will you work to realize it?

With love and gratitude,



 

 

Now available! My new book, in collaboration with Yoganand Michael Carroll, Pranayama: A Path to Healing and Freedom.